（為保持原汁原味，本文祇用英文撰寫。）
Can't be much clearer
One of my colleagues was rather puzzled yesterday at lunch. 'The sign says "Clear Chicken Soup", but it is creamy with mushrooms,' he said, and after taking the first slurp of the soup, 'and it also has some chicken in it.'
Then I asked, 'Are you sure the English and German signs say the same thing?'
'Yes, they are consistent with each other.'
'Well, at least we can say it is clearly chicken soup.'
Bloody fantastic!
Our canteen wanted to cater to some extreme tastes for once, and came up with this 'Your favourite dish' that would be stunning to the senses of vision and smell. The blood-thirsty customers were flocking to try it out:
which, in English, would translate as:
Slaughter plate with blood, liver sausages, sauerkraut (sour shredded cabbage) and pan-fried potatoes
If this is not enough to satisfy your appetite, may I recommend 'Chocolate Mouse' for dessert ...
(But what we got in the end was only blood sausage instead of something so sanguinary. The blood-loving German customers among us have probably felt deceived by the missing hyphen after the word 'Blut'!)
Divide and suffer
While it may be hard to choose the best pick-up line, surely nothing will beat this as a break-up line ...
A couple, whose mother tongues were not English, was on the verge of breaking up.
One night, they were drowning their sorrows together by directly emptying one bottle of wine after another. The woman showed no sign of letting up on her relentless binge while the man was struggling half way through his umpteenth bottle.
The woman jeered at the man, 'Look at you, you can't even finish this!'
The man was not too amused. 'It's impossible,' and after a pause, he held the half-full bottle towards the woman and continued, 'How about I split up with you?'
Instead of a wine glass, the woman gave him a full slab in the face in no time, ran out of the house, slammed the door violently and left him bemused as to how he deserved that fate ...
(A true punch line adapted to this fictitious tale.)
Can't be much clearer
One of my colleagues was rather puzzled yesterday at lunch. 'The sign says "Clear Chicken Soup", but it is creamy with mushrooms,' he said, and after taking the first slurp of the soup, 'and it also has some chicken in it.'
Then I asked, 'Are you sure the English and German signs say the same thing?'
'Yes, they are consistent with each other.'
'Well, at least we can say it is clearly chicken soup.'
Bloody fantastic!
Our canteen wanted to cater to some extreme tastes for once, and came up with this 'Your favourite dish' that would be stunning to the senses of vision and smell. The blood-thirsty customers were flocking to try it out:
which, in English, would translate as:
Slaughter plate with blood, liver sausages, sauerkraut (sour shredded cabbage) and pan-fried potatoes
If this is not enough to satisfy your appetite, may I recommend 'Chocolate Mouse' for dessert ...
(But what we got in the end was only blood sausage instead of something so sanguinary. The blood-loving German customers among us have probably felt deceived by the missing hyphen after the word 'Blut'!)
Divide and suffer
While it may be hard to choose the best pick-up line, surely nothing will beat this as a break-up line ...
A couple, whose mother tongues were not English, was on the verge of breaking up.
One night, they were drowning their sorrows together by directly emptying one bottle of wine after another. The woman showed no sign of letting up on her relentless binge while the man was struggling half way through his umpteenth bottle.
The woman jeered at the man, 'Look at you, you can't even finish this!'
The man was not too amused. 'It's impossible,' and after a pause, he held the half-full bottle towards the woman and continued, 'How about I split up with you?'
Instead of a wine glass, the woman gave him a full slab in the face in no time, ran out of the house, slammed the door violently and left him bemused as to how he deserved that fate ...
(A true punch line adapted to this fictitious tale.)
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